Friday, December 13, 2013

Blog Tour: The Rocker That Holds Her by Terri Anne Browning

Mature Content! Not Suitable For Readers Under 17 

The Rocker That Holds Her

I had big dreams of how I wanted my life. Becoming a rock star was all I wanted. It would solve so many of my problems. With the money that I would make I was going to take care of my mom, get her out of the hell hole we had been living in all my life. Having your dreams come true isn’t something that many
people get to accomplish in life. I did, and I loved it.

For about a minute…

It’s funny how when you think you have everything you could possible every want, your dreams change. Mine did without my even realizing it. Then I opened my eyes and saw that everything I ever wanted was standing in front of me.

From the first day I set eyes on Emmie she became a part of me. The guys and I spent years watching over her, caring for her… Loving her. Then without my realizing it my love for her changed. I found myself aching for her, wanting her in a way that a guy like me had no right to want her. My love and need for Emmie became an all-consuming ache that I was helpless to fight against.

Would she ever open those big green eyes and see me as anything but a friend?

4.5 Star Review by Lisa Kane

In the Rocker That Holds Me, the first in Terri Ann Browning’s Rocker series, we had Emmie and Nik’s story from Emmie’s POV. Here we read Nik’s side of things. Of all the band mates from Demon’s Wings, Nik is my favorite. The lead singer has been in love with Emmie for a very long time, fighting his feelings for a few of those years, due to her age. For Nik, his protective feelings of a big brother slowly changed to those of a man for a woman. He drowned himself in alcohol and groupies, trying his best to suppress the feelings he had for Emmie, believing she deserved better and didn’t reciprocate his love.

I love reading a guy’s perspective in scenes previously written from the girl’s view point. How Nik could misinterpret Emmie’s reserve for disinterest makes me shake my head. Only a guy would fail to see a woman trying her best to guard her heart, especially after she knows he falls into bed night after night with a different woman.

Nik finally gave up trying to forget her with the flavors of the night, and chose to be alone rather than keep using women when it was all in vain. Nik’s reaction to Emmie and Axton’s friendship and his rage over her pregnancy was such a revelation of how he must have been hurting all that time. He longed for her but believed she had feelings for Jesse or Axton and would never see him for anything but a big brother.

When these two finally opened up to one another, Nik really showed his swoon worthiness! Not only is he hot and gorgeous, but he wrapped himself up in his Emmie bubble and the love his shows for his little girl, almost made me tear up.

What a great addition this latest installment is to the Rocker series. It keeps getting better and better!

Three Chicks interview Nik and Emmie

Three Chicks:  Emmie, why didn’t you tell Nik what Gabriella had told you about sleeping with him? 

Emmie:  I’ve never confronted him about his other one-night stands before. Even though the thought of him being with Gabriella bothered me more than any other woman, I felt I didn’t have a right to talk to him about it. After all, we were just friends at the time…

Three Chicks:  Nik, every time Gabriella’s name came up Emmie would flash the death ray eyes at you-how did you not pick up something was wrong? 

Nik:  *Grimace* I did pick up on it actually, but thought it was because of something else entirely. I still thought that Emmie and Gabriella were feuding over Axton. That would just piss me off, so I never called her on it.

Three Chicks:  Emmie, you lost your virginity to the man you loved, thinking that he thought you were a groupie. I can't imagine what that would feel like. Was there ever a moment when you thought about telling him the truth about that night? 

Emmie:  No. I thought if I told him the truth it would destroy what relationship we did have. I couldn’t have handled not having him in my life at all. So I kept quiet, living off the memories when I was alone.

Three Chicks:  Nik, do you think since finding Emmie when she was 5 that in some way you two were destined to be together? 

Nik:  Yeah, actually I do. Even then, at the age of 15 when I had no idea what real love was about, I felt that connection. It wasn’t something gross or perverted, but beautiful even then. She was my little baby doll. I fought it for so long and I refused to let myself admit that she had been mine all along.

Three Chicks:  Emmie, when it got out that you were pregnant the rumors were that you trapped Nik. Was there a part of you that felt he might believe that to be true? It seems when it comes to Nik and his love for you, you become very insecure. Why? 

Emmie:  Yes, I felt like I did trap him. Honestly, at times I still feel like I don’t deserve him. Growing up, with the monster I did, I was always made to feel undeserving, to feel as if I was never going to be loved.

Three Chicks:  Nik, how insecure did Axton’s feeling for Emmie make you and Emmie, did you ever realize Axton felt more than a friendship for you?  

NIK: It drove me freaking nuts. I knew that if he ever decided to straighten his sh… crap up, that he would be able to win her over. 

Emmie: I had a suspicion that he felt something stronger than friendship. But I know it couldn’t be as strong as what Nik—and Axton—have made it to be in their heads. Axton was in love with the idea of being in love. I challenged him, I made him work at being my friend, and in return I loved him unconditionally. As a friend only. Nik had nothing to worry about regardless, because I will never be able to feel anything as deep and unbreakable as what I feel for him.

Three Chicks:  Some people seemed to know that your feelings for each other were more than just friends. But yet it still took you both years and a pregnancy to admit them to each how is it that neither of you saw what was right in front of you? Or were you both just really good at hiding it.

Emmie: I don’t know how good we were at hiding it from each other. When I look back, I wonder how I hadn’t seen just how much he loved me then. I think it was more we refused to believe—to hope!—that we could end up together. We were stupid and wasted some really good years that we could have been together.

Three Chicks:  Emmie, why did you believe if you married Nik that you would end up losing him? 

Emmie:  *Bites lip and sighs* Change has always been a bad thing in my life and I was so happy with Nik right then. We had the perfect life. Love, family, a baby that we adored. I was terrified that if we got married it would change. I thought maybe he would come to resent me—maybe even Mia too… Okay, so I was still insecure about trapping him. I’m crazy at times like that.

Nik: *Grasps Emmie’s hand and kisses her fingers* I love you, crazy bitch and all.

Three Chicks:  Nik, you were with other women to try to push away your feelings for Emmie. Why not just take the risk and tell her. You seemed miserable not being able to control your feelings so why not talk to her about them? 

Nik:  I was a coward, that’s why. I couldn’t face the rejection if she didn’t love me back. I wouldn’t have been able to face life I knew for a fact that she didn’t love me. So I made us both suffer. It’s one of the biggest regrets of my life.

Three Chicks:  Emmie what does each Demon mean to you and what role would you say they each play in your life? 

Emmie:  Well, obviously you know what role Nik plays. *Grins* Jesse will always be like my parent. He still acts like I’m his little Emmie. Shane has always been like my brother. We are as close as any brother and sister could possibly be. And Drake… He was the one that needed me the most. He helped me forget about my own demons because I was so busy helping him fight his own. Now that he’s so happy with Lana I don’t have to do that any longer. But that doesn’t mean we are any less close because of it. If anything Drake’s bond with Mia has strengthened our own bond.

Three Chicks:  Nik, when you finally got up the nerve to play the song you wrote for Emmie in concert and realized she didn’t hear it, how did you feel? How often do you play it now? 

Nik:  I was pissed! I thought that she had heard it and left to tell me she didn’t feel the same way… Now, I sing it to her whenever I feel like she’s feeling insecure. Sometimes it’s every few days. Sometimes I don’t sing it for a month. But when I do sing it, she knows immediately that she’s the only thing I will ever need.

Three Chicks:  Emmie, why do you think you are so close to Jesse and share such a connection with him? 

Emmie:  He’s the dad I never had, maybe the mom I never had too. Jesse has something about him that can make you feel so safe. Maybe it’s his size, with those big wide shoulders that seem like they can keep the world standing. I’m not sure, but that’s how it’s been for me. He helped me through those years with my monster mother by keeping the world standing…

Three Chicks:  Will Mia be an only child or do you have plans to expand the Armstrong family? 

Nik: I’ve been trying to talk Emmie into another baby soon. 

Emmie: I do want another baby. But right now with all the responsibilities I have with Demon’s Wings and signing OtherWorld as well, I feel like it’s not the right time. Mia is more than a handful at times and I want to focus on her.

Three Chicks:  How do you think touring on the road will work out once all the Demon’s Wings kids are in school, especially considering Emmie is your manager? 

Emmie: Once they are all in school we plan on only doing summer tours, and holiday events. I know the guys aren’t going to want to be away from their kids for long, so we will have to revamp the bus and buy a few more so that we can tour together.

About Author

Hated school and reading until her aunt handed over her first romance novel at the age of twelve, as crazy aunts tend to do. It gave her a passion for the written word that has only increased over the years.  At sixteen she started writing her own novellas, forcing her sister to be her one woman fan club. Now she has a few more fans and a lot more passion for writing. Reese: A Safe Haven Novella was her first Indie published book. The Rocker That Holds Me changed the tables and kicked off The Rocker… series featuring the sinfully delicious members of Demon’s Wings. Terri Anne lives just outside of Birmingham, AL with her husband and three children.


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