Monday, October 28, 2013

Blog tour: His Ever After by Jessica Ingro


All is fair in love and war.

Jacob Matthews learned that lesson the hard way when he discovered just how far some people will go to win someone’s heart.

When fate brought Samantha Monroe back into Jacob’s life, he finally started to believe that his world was going to be complete. He loves Sam with the kind of intensity that burns deep and scalds your very soul. But fate had other ideas in mind, forcing him into a life filled with cold touches, long silences and complete misery.

Brooke Dugan had to have Jacob Matthews. It didn’t matter that he was in love with someone else, she always got what she wanted. And what she wanted was Jacob. Brooke vowed that she would stop at nothing until Jacob was tied to her forever… in both life and death.

Find out what happens when lies are revealed and the bitter truth comes out. Hearts will be broken and bonds will be tested.

Everyone is worthy of love – even Jacob, but can he find his happily ever after?

4.5 Stars by Jen Hagen
This is the continuation of Jacob’s story from Love Square.  This book is mainly told in his point of view, although we do get to see and hear from Aiden and Sam along with Brooke, the other characters from Love Square.

Jacob is in a dark place.  He is still living in a dream world where he and Sam are in love.  He can’t seem to move forward and accept the fact that she has moved on with Aiden. 

“I’m not exactly sure what a broken heart feels like, but I’m guessing this is as close as it gets.”

Jacob and Sam had a history that went back 16 years.  Unfortunately, an 18-year-old Jacob made a poor decision that has perhaps changed the course of his life and any chance at finding love will never be his as he will always be pining for his true love, Sam.  While Sam and Aiden are a happy family, Jacob is trying to put his life together again.  Brooke is there to help him, in fact she is more than happy to be there for him and desperately wants to be in his life, even if it means deceiving him is the only way to become part of it.  Jacob feels he deserves the unhappy life he is suddenly dealt.  He feels he is to blame for an event that has left him devastated. 

“I cry because I couldn’t be what she wanted.  But mostly I cry because this is all my fault.”

How do you move forward when all you can do is place the blame on yourself?  How can Jacob let go of the guilt and self-loathing?  If you’re Jacob, you try by numbing yourself in alcohol and women…lots and lots of women.

“I’m not even sure how many women I’ve slept with or what all their names are.  All I know is that it allows me to forget everything for a little while, before it all comes crashing back into me.”

During this time period in Jacob’s life he is not a nice guy.  In fact, I referred to him as being a douche bag.  He is in a dark, dark place and he says hurtful things to people who care about him.   You know the author has done such a fine job creating a character when we can sympathize with him and forgive him for his poor choices.  I never found myself disliking the character of Jacob even when he was being a jerk.  Sure I got disappointed in the poor choices he was making and would slap my forehead and say to myself  “I can’t believe you just said that, Jacob.”   I was always able to forgive him because he had worked a way into my heart.  I knew he was so broken and he just needed to climb out of the dark at his own pace. 

Eventually Jacob becomes aware of the deception that Aiden was willing to go to in order to save his marriage to Sam.  Could this be his chance at finding happiness again?  Will Sam come to him when the truth is revealed? 

“Jake.  I’ll always love you.”  Her words make my heart soar.
“Then say you’ll be with me.  Say you’ll let me love you forever.  Say you’ll make me whole again.”

Will it be Sam that puts the pieces of his heart back together again?

“Why do you call me sunshine?”  She asks with her eyes still closed.
“Before you, all I knew was darkness.  You brought the light into my life.”  She gifts me with a warm smile and with that, I finally feel at peace again.

If anybody deserved a happily ever after, it was Jacob.  He was a tortured person whose life was changed by somebody who decided to play God with his life and change the course of fate. 

One of the reasons why I embraced this story is because it involved characters that I could relate to.  They weren’t 20 year olds being involved in their first relationship and wanting to test the waters.  These were characters who were older and more established in their lives.  Jacob is 34 and still trying to find some semblance of happiness.   Life isn’t all hearts and flowers and I was glad to be given the opportunity to read a book that dealt with problems that even a married woman could see herself going through.  We could relate to Sam in Love Square that she had hit a stagnant place in her marriage and was searching for something…she didn’t even know what it was, but she knew she wasn’t happy.   We can relate to Jacob and forgive him because Sam was his one true love and how do you ever let go of that?  When reading about 20 year olds caught in a love triangle and the one not chosen hurts, I always find myself thinking “you’ll find love again” but as the years progress and if you have never gotten over the love you let go, then I can sympathize with the character a little more.  I think that’s why Jacob’s hold on my heart was so strong.  Jacob faced a lot of challenges in this book and if you didn’t love him before, you will at the end of the book. 

Bonus scene 

Brooke's POV

Argh! I punch my pillow and try to get comfortable for the millionth time. I just can’t sleep when Jacob’s not here. The stress I’ve been feeling lately just keeps pressing in on me. It’s a physical thing that I carry around with me. I really hoped that once Jacob and I were together without Samantha lingering over us, things would get better. But I can’t turn my brain off. It’s playing tricks on me, I know it. I just can’t seem to stop it. I need to be stronger. I need to control it.

I’ve tried so hard these last few weeks to not react to it. After Emma told me that I need to make a better effort if I want to be a member of their family, I feel the need to be the perfect woman for Jacob. It was humiliating when Kara was welcomed with open arms at Emma’s house and I was forced to be an outsider looking in. I was so damn jealous of her and her ability to fit in so easily. I wish I could be more like her in that aspect. I know I owe her an apology, but I don’t want her to see how weak I am. She’ll just give me the same lecture she always gives me, and I don’t want to hear it. Sure it comes from a good place, but this is my life and my decisions.

I can’t let Jacob’s sister or my friend undermine my progress with him. I want this life. I want him. I know I can be what he wants and needs. I just need to get my head in check.

I sigh loudly while beginning another set of tosses and turns, ending with a flop onto my back. I haven’t told Jacob how hard it is for me when he has to work at night and I’m alone. The last thing I need is to come across too clingy and desperate. And I don’t want him to think I’m crazy. I get enough of that from my father.

Since I can’t fall back to sleep, I suppose I should just get up and start the day. I lean up on an elbow and push myself into a sitting position on the edge of the bed. I stare into the dark and stretch my neck, which is now aching from the tension in my body. Reaching over and flipping on the light, my eyes squint from the brightness. I rub my palms over my eyelids and slowly adjust to the light. My eyes catch on the picture of Jacob and me that sits on my dresser. It was taken a few months back, in St. Barths, while we were on vacation. We had so much fun when we were there. We made love on the beach and I think we really connected with each other.

Memories like that is why I’ve done everything I’ve done. It’s been my driving force.I take a quick shower and put on sweats and a t-shirt before heading to the kitchen and brewing a cup of coffee. It’s still early and the sun has barely breached the sky. After a few sips of much needed caffeine, I’m alert and ready to take on the day.

I walk into the room that doubles as both an office and a guest bedroom and take stock of my surroundings. There is nothing extraordinary about this room, just a bed, dresser, leather club chair and a desk. It’s representative of Jacob’s days as a bachelor, when this place was bland and lacking personality. Over the last few months, I’ve found Jacob sitting in that chair numerous times. It’s odd, almost like he’s reflecting. My goal is to make this room warm and inviting. I want my man to be surrounded by warmth when he is in here. Warmth that I gave him.

I strip the bed and pile the sheets on the floor by the door, before turning back to the dresser and gathering all the knick knacks and pictures. I set them in a pile on the bed. Next I start grabbing the papers and other items on the computer desk and add them to the pile. I need to clear out the room and get it prepped before I go to get paint. Once I have everything in a pile on the bed, I head out to the hall closet and look for a box to put it all in. Coming up empty, I walk back into the spare bedroom and open the closet door, hoping to find a box in there.

Opening the door, I find that the closet is anything but organized. There are piles of hats, toppled over and falling on the floor. Old running shoes and boots haphazardly strewn on the floor. A pair of skis tilted precariously. I sigh, knowing that my day just got a little longer. There is no way I can leave the closet in this state. I might be a tad bit OCD when it comes to keeping my living area clean and organized.

I start on the floor and begin clearing everything out of the closet. I make piles around the room, based on its purpose. When I reach up and grab a box from the top shelf, something falls and hits me on the head. I set the box on the floor and reach down to grab the item. Picking up the book, my hands start to tremble and anger radiates through me. The title is Love Square and the author is one Samantha Monroe. The book is beginning to show wear and there are a few pages ear marked. I thumb through and find a place holder, and begin reading a scene where that bitch and my fiancé have fucking sex on the god damned kitchen table. Knowing how that fucking skank let Jacob handcuff her, turns my stomach. I throw the book across the room and start tearing through boxes looking for more hidden bullshit.

When I don’t find anything right away, I start to lose some of my steam. Maybe I’m overreacting. Maybe he was just curious. But that doesn’t explain the folded pages or the obvious fact that the book has been opened many times. I kick the last box a little harder than I intended and it tips over. Pictures spill out across the hardwood. Loads and loads of pictures.

Pictures of Jacob and Samantha at a Prom, pictures of them sitting on a tailgate of a truck, pictures down by a lake, more recent pictures of them at a Red Sox game, and at Murphy’s. So many damn pictures. The worse is a picture of Jacob caught up in rapture, clearly taken by the person taking him there. What. The. Fuck. I tear the picture in half and start attacking the others.

This is wrong on so many levels. How could he do this to me? To us? This whole time he’s been lying to me. He’s been pretending to love me, while he thinks about her. He never let go of that bitch. Everything I’ve done for him has been done in vain. That fucking asshole played me!

“Aaaaaahhhhhhh!” I scream, as I throw and kick things all around the room. I grab my hair on both sides of my head and tug viciously, welcoming the pain. At least this pain I can control. I glance down at my hands to see patches of my hair threaded through my fingers. I throw it to the floor and storm into our room.

I swipe my arm across the top of the dresser, causing perfume, cologne, and pictures to fly haphazardly. The sound of breaking glass spurs on my movements. I rip the sheets of our bed before turning my attention to our clothes. I rip them off hangers and throw them to the ground.

I pick up the lamp from the end table and hurl it into the mirror, watching as it shatters into a million pieces.

Once the room is obliterated, my chest heaves with exertion and tears start to fall from my eyes. This whole life that I’ve careful crafted has turned to shit. I can’t stand the fact that he’s lied to me. I refuse to be anyone’s fool.

Something inside me has snapped. I can’t keep on living like this. I refuse to walk away from Jacob and watch as he finds someone else to make him happy. And I refuse to let that bitch win him back either. I can’t go on with all this pressure. For years I’ve struggled, knowing that whatever I do isn’t enough. It isn’t enough for my parents and it isn’t enough for the man I love more than life itself.

I sink to my knees and sob. Why aren’t I ever enough? All the ups and downs mean nothing without Jacob. I used to think that as long as we had each other, I could handle it. But I don’t have him. I might have his body when he wants to give it to me, but I’ll never have his mind or soul.

After I’ve expelled all my tears, I swipe at the wetness on my face and move with purpose into the kitchen and get what I’m looking for. Then I dig through the mess in the spare bedroom and find Sam’s book. I know what needs to be done. I’m going to make that fucker pay.

Author Bio:

Jessica is the author of the Love Square series. She grew up in Central New York, where she spends her days as a Security Analyst at an IT consulting company. In her free time, she enjoys reading booksand developing ideas for her own stories. Writing is her secret passion that she's been fostering since elementary school, when she wrote her first book about a puppy. It has always been a dream of hers tobe able to share her stories with the world.

Jessica currently lives in New York with her husband and three dogs.

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  1. i was referred by denise smith

  2. yes i do think every charector deserves their own happy ever after i think real life is hard and we dont see happy marriages that often denise smith

  3. Yes, I want all the characters to find whatever their HEA should be from a book/story. It's all part of the great escape for me so having that happiness for everyone just makes it more enjoyable.

  4. Of course you want every character to find their HEA!!! We all need to have hope that love is still out there and that everyone can have their chance!

  5. We all need to believe in love... so, yes, every character deserves his/her happy ever after!


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